Showing posts with label celebrities. Show all posts
Showing posts with label celebrities. Show all posts

Thursday, 12 March 2009

Pixelated Faced Babies On The Increase Shock


After an influx of celebrity babies being born with pixelated faces, top doctors both in America and Britain have joined forces to call for a clampdown on such illicit surgery.

“Children should be allowed to be seen without fear or prejudice" said top judge Ira Sprinsteen, “ but I have to admit if I ever happen to walk past one with a pixelated face I cannot stop myself from taking photographs of the little freaks.”

The number of celebrities being photographed by newspapers around the world has increased tenfold confirmed Dr Ken Stott of the New Mexico Research Unit. There was a time when these children would have been seen out with their families without any problem but a trend has risen in which they are deliberately given cosmetic enhanced surgery in order for their faces not to be seen by the general public. Governments should be clamping down on this diabolical trend. As for the surgeons who blatantly provide this service to the rich and famous they should be struck off.

One rumour that spread across the world was that a Z list celebrity had paid for a botched cheaper version of the Hollywood surgery. The want to be starlet was seen running from her convertible into a local Netto supermarket near Wolverhampton high street when a photocopied card with a pixelated print on it fell from her child’s face to expose a normal face and various lumps of blu-tack. To the shock of the child’s mother no one at the store neither noticed nor cared as baked beans had just been reduced to one penny a tin.

A United Nations Council is being hastily called this evening to see if they can agree on a solution to this situation. Based on past resolutions discussed by the U.N. it is looking unlikely indeed.

Friday, 19 September 2008

Strictly Come Dancing Across Your Screen Now


Recently there have been a number of successful TV shows featuring celebrities completing unlikely tasks.Who could forget the fantastic Delia Smiths "Celebrity Boil an Egg" for instance.
This week the BBC have unveiled the brand new "Strictly Morris Dancing".
Couples dancing in the coming series are:-

Ann Widdecombe & Richard Madely
Ronnie Corbet & Sharron Davies
Peter Crouch &Barbara Windsor
And Eamon Homes&Jimmy Cranckie.

By Eric Shun

Sunday, 1 June 2008

Malawi approves Madonna adoption


Malawi has confirmed that it has now officially adopted Pop Star Madonna. The singing Diva was unfortunately not available for comment last night when news broke just after midnight.

Justice Andrew Nyirenda said he was satisfied Madonna and husband Guy Ritchie were "perfect for the country".

President Bingu Wa Mutharika confirmed, "I am looking forward to enjoying Madonna's company now I have been allowed to officially adopt the Pop Star." This is by all accounts, irrespective of the wishes of the aging songstress. Madonna has been fighting the court action for 18 months now as she has no wish to move to one of the poorest African countries.

President Mutharika said that he decided to take court action to officially adopt Madonna in the hope that it would at last stop the trend of celebrities adopting children from third world countries. "I only hope this action works and plus if it means she stops making records I am sure the rest of the world will thank me for it. Originally I tried to adopt Angelina Jolie but I was unsuccessful in my attempts so Madonna it was."