Friday 15 January 2010

Britain Suffering Low Levels Of Normal Moaning


Experts have confirmed that Britain it is not quite ready to get back to its usual degree of moaning.

Due to the recent extreme weather conditions that have hit British shores general every day moaning has been for a time placed on the back burner. The reason for this change is wholly due to current national obsession with snow, ice and daily weather forecasts.

Henry and Iris Walton from Norwich have actually welcomed the heavy snow falls, “It has been a real godsend for us both to be honest with you. After 55 years of a stale lifeless marriage Iris and I have at last got something to talk to each other about. The way I look at it, at least we are not screaming in silence at each others every move like we normally would be doing. I know snow isn’t everyone’s cup of tea but it has helped us.”

Dr Hillary James, health expert for the GNT confirmed “Although there is nothing wrong in making tea with boiled snow under certain conditions it is not recommended. I would like to warn elderly readers to particularly stay clear of any yellow or brown stained snow for tea making as they could be in for a bit of a shock.”

The Met Office have confirmed that the snow storms are set to continue on and off in some parts of the country for at least another week. As such it is expected that this should keep all weather related moaning at maximum levels and keep any normal New Year moaning at unprecedented low levels.

Experts are currently pondering on what impact this will have on an already stressed out Nation. Government agencies have been supplied with extra supplies of earplugs in order to help their staffs with the expected avalanche of bemoaning that is coming their way once the ice has melted and the roads are clear again.

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