Gay Entity To Be Probed In Brighton Now In Doubt

A retired couple who recently moved in to their new bungalow in Brighton were shocked to find they were sharing it with a gay poltergeist it was reported this week in the Brighton and Hove Examiner. Arthur and Mary Ledbetter had only moved in to their bungalow a day when strange things started to happen.

“We had moved from London after retirement and found this lovely bungalow which suited us to the ground. It wasn’t until the next day that we were alerted to our visitor. We had nipped to the local shops to get provisions for the week I had parked the car and when we entered the front door we had the shock of our lives. The scatter cushions were all in an intricate pattern and the living room window was open. We were deeply shocked thinking we had been burgled. But this was soon in doubt however, when we noticed in the kitchen a Quiche was slowly baking in the oven.”

The couple have become accustomed to their gay poltergeists behaviour over the last couple of weeks and readily invite family and friends around to visit. Mr Ledbetter confirmed that their visitor is certainly taking the strain of every day household chores off their backs. “You can often see the Hoover being used to pick up crumbs off the floor when we are eating. Rue the day however, should anyone put a hot tea cup down on a table top without a place mat, the tut-tuting noises go on for hours.”

Experts say that gay poltergeists are not a new phenomenon at all as others have been reported across the country. Single straight men are still reticent over the phenomenon we have been informed, even if the housework is being done to a high standard.

Poltergeist Activity Not All It Was Said To Be

Investigators called in to a retirement home in Bradford due to reports of poltergeist activity have called off the investigation today. Dr Ken Stott of the Institute of Psychokinesis Research at York University confirmed that the poltergeist activity had been called in to question after a detailed research was made over the weekend. The loud noises, sudden unexplained movements and foul smells were not created by an evil entity after all.

Dr Stott confirmed to waiting journalists, " Most of these type of activities though often attributed to poltergeist activities are just as likely to occur in a large proportion of men's underpants on a regular basis."